The Lycan King

Chapter 19. Wolf

Avalyn

I was coughing too much. The burning sensation in my lungs was dimming. Then suddenly I felt air fill

my lungs and I woke up with a gasp. I saw Master's concerned looking face looming right above mine.

He was drenched. He was the one who pulled me out of the water. Why did he save me? Did he really

care?

"Are you okay?" He asked me in that soft voice of his.

No. He didn't care. He never cared to correct my bad behaviour but he was going to punish Natalia for

something she did. He was not?my?Master. Was I not enough for him? Did he get bored with me? Was

he with other women all this time he showered me with sweet words? All this time when he made me

believe he liked me and wanted me as his luna? Especially when I was falling in love with him.

My heart could not bare more wounds. I was tired. I really really want to give up, to die.

Tears leaked through my eyes. He tried to wipe them but I pushed his hand away before he could touch

me. I didn't want him to touch me anymore. I don't think I could bare his or anyone's touching me now.

Whom to trust when the one who claims to be your soulmate betrays you?

But he never said that he wanted to mate me. He had implied it many times but never actually?told?

me. He never said he wanted to mark me.

I never expected anything from Emilio so I was never disappointed or shocked by his cruelty. But I

expected Nikolai to be so much more. He gave me?hope. He gave me a new life. If that isn't love then

what is?

"Why did you pull me out?" I rasped out. My throat was scratchy. His eyes widened by a fraction but I

caught that he was surprised.

"Why did you go in?" He asked me instead. His eyes seemed so gentle and caring. But it was all lies. I

know it now.

"You said that I am a free person now and I can do whatever I want. And right now, I want you to leave

me alone. I want to kill myself. I want to be with Papa. I want?peace?Nikolai." I said as more tears fell

down my cheeks. I pursed my lips so I don't start crying.

His eyes darkened and his hand griped my wrist hard enough to bruise. I took it without flinching.

Try me, I've had worse!?I dared him with my eyes.

I looked dead in his eyes, as if I was not affected at all. "Let me go." I demanded.

"You are not going anywhere." He eyes flashed but he managed to keep his voice controlled. Good. I

wanted him to be angry. I wanted to hurt him as much as he hurt me.

"You are not my Master." I uttered the words that plunged a hole through my heart.

Hurting him is not what I want.

What do I want then?

I want my mate, my Master. I want him to love me. I want him to care. I also want him to punish me

sometimes. I want things to go back to the way they were. And finally, I want peace.

"But I am a beast and I will lock this beauty in my castle forever if I have to." He gritted and pulled me

up with a tug so we both were standing and then threw me over his shoulder. He started walking back

towards the house but I didn't want to go back. I pounded on his back, willing him to let go.

"I am free, I can do whatever I want. I said let me go Nikolai!" I demanded, still pounding at his back.

The stinging pain on both my ass-cheeks made me realise that he spanked me. Twice and that too,

hard. I gasped.

"You are not free, you are bound to me and I will never let you go. You wanted me to punish you right?

Now you will get a real punishment." He growled angrily, as he walked up the trail to the house.

I went limp at that. I didn't want a punishment from him now, not after what I saw with Natalia, it didn't

feel right anymore. I would have given up everything for this before but not now, not after seeing him

with her.

He carried me in the house and I could feel everyone were staring at our wet forms, there were a lot of

men in the living room than normal too and there were a lot of wolfs outside too. He carried me to his

room and threw me on the bed and locked the door.

"Strip. Kneel." He ordered furiously.

"No." I told him, holding my ground.

I love him with all my heart. I know I do. But I couldn't submit to him like this, not forcefully. I did it

because I loved him and not because I was scared of him. I would die before I submit myself to another

man to whom I didn't want to.

"What did you just say?" He whispered, sounding shocked.

"I said no." I replied and walked in the washroom, closing the door behind me.

I was shivering and if he was not going to let me die, I could atleast get warm. I took off my clothes and

started a hot shower. I heard the door open and I could feel Nikolai's gaze on me, I could feel him

coming near me.

I turned towards him and shook my head firmly. He stilled and retracted his hand that was going

towards his shirt buttons. He wanted us to shower together but that was not happening. I took my eyes

off him and then eyed the door before looking at him again, silently asking him to leave. I wanted to be

alone right now.

I was so hurt, furious and disappointed in him. He goes to someone else because he doesn't like me

and when I'm finally leaving, he comes back to me. I didn't know how normal relationships worked

exactly but I knew it was not like what he did to me. Was yesterday night a lie? Was everything he told

me was a game to him? Did he even like me at all?

I saw him clench his fist but he walked out anyways.

I finished my shower and searched for dry clothes but I didn't find anything except a shirt of Nikolai's. I

didn't want to be naked in front of him again so I wore it and walked out. He was sitting on the bed with

his head in his hand. I ignored him and started going towards the door. I decided to sleep in guest

room.

"Where are you going dressed like this?" He asked me.

"I am free, am I not Nikolai? I can wear what I want and and go where I want." I shut the door behind

me and my heart hammered in my chest.

I was hurt and I didn't know what to do. I wanted to cry, I wanted to vent out my anger and frustration

but instead, I forced my legs to move forward and into the guest bedroom down the hall. Before I could

enter enter the room, I was gently turned around.

"Come back to our room." Nikolai whispered.

"I can't." I whispered and shut my eyes. A few tears slid down my eyes.

He was the one to make me realise my self worth, call me his Luna, his Queen, he helped me love

myself. However unconventional our relationship would be, I can't be with someone who cheated on

me. Maybe he cared but just caring wasn't enough. I understood that now. Love, trust, respect and

loyalty are equally important.

"Please,?Moya Lyubov."?He begged.

"How can you call me 'your love' after this?" I whispered as I looked down.

I didn't want him to see me cry. I did not want to see his expression, afraid that I would lose my

newfound determination just by looking in his eyes.

"This is not what you think it is. If you would just let me fucking explain." He said, frustration tinged with

hurt slipping in his voice.

"I'm sorry. I can't, at least not just yet." I said, finally looking in his eyes. I wanted him to understand

what I was feeling. I didn't know how to explain it to him.

"You can sleep in our room. I'll sleep here if you want." He whispered dejectedly.

I nodded and walked out of the room. I knew this was the most he would be willing to compromise. I

walked into our room and locked the door behind me. I knew he would not come in but I didn't want to

take any chances.

I couldn't sleep so I slid open the doors of the balcony and stepped out and sat on the hanging swing

chair that Nikolai had bought for me as a gift. He said that I would love it and I did.

Everything reminded me of him.

I sighed.

I didn't know what to do. I looked at the ocean. I had a clear view from here. It was very dark but I could

see almost everything. I saw some movement and when I looked down I saw a blur of fur run into the

woods.

I instinctively knew that it was Nikolai. Seems like he couldn't sleep too. I thought about our relationship

from the start. From everything he had done for me, not once did I feel that he didn't care for me or

made me feel like he didn't like me.

I thought if all this really was a misunderstanding, I should have let him explain. If I hadn't been

stubborn and listened to what he was telling me, all of this could have been avoided. I even disobeyed

his command. He always did everything I asked him to and I couldn't even do one thing that he wanted

me to. I really was a shitty mate.

I knew he cared for me, my anger clouded my judgment. I was so glad that Nikolai pulled me out of the

water. I wasn't scared of dying, death never scared me but I am scared for what I would leave behind. I

had people who cared about me now. Nikolai,?oh god,?I can't believe I was going to hurt him like this.

I wiped the tears that had escaped my eyes and looked towards the woods again, trying to see if

Nikolai was coming back. It had been a long time since he ran away. After focusing for a sometime, I

could see clearly, the dark didn't affect my vision anymore. In fact, I could see better than ever before. I

could see the plants and the bushes on the border of the woods clearly, I could see the birds in their

nests.

It was like I was seeing a whole new world. It was all enhanced now. My senses were enhanced now. I

heard a low growl and then a crunching sound. But it felt like it was miles away.

What was that sound? Did something happened to Nikolai? I jumped out of my chair and in under a

minute I saw Nikolai in his wolf form walk out of the woods carrying the head of an elk. It had one of the

largest horns I had ever seen on one.

His black eyes snapped to mine like he already knew I was here. I started at him. His big midnight

black wolf carrying the head of an elk was a huge turn on. Males gifted their mates the heads of the

animals they killed. It was a sign of gratitude for being their mates and a symbol which meant that what

I kill, is yours, what I have is yours. And the head of an elk was one of the greatest gifts as it is difficult

to kill because of its large horns.

As if in a trans, I climbed on top of the railing of the balcony and jumped down. I saw Nikolai drop the

elk head on the ground and run to me. I landed on the ground on my feet and used my one hand to

support my weight. I stood up from my crouched position to see Nikolai come to a standstill a few feet

away from me. He was looking at me with a shocked expression.

I walked to him rubbed my hand over his snout. Blood was smeared all over it. He had done this for

me. I closed my eyes and relished in that thought. He cared for me. I caressed his head and then

behind his ears, where his soft spot was. He purred. The big bad Alpha?purred. I walked behind and

jumped on his back, getting on easily.

"Let's go for a run." I told him. I barely finished my sentence and we were already gliding through the Belongs to (N)ôvel/Drama.Org.

woods. He was running so fast that even with this enhanced eyesight, I could only make out blurred

colours of my surroundings.

I absolutely loved it.

I tightened my hold on his neck, hugging him. I missed him. For a split second he slowed down before

catching up with his normal speed.

"I am sorry Nikolai." I whispered as I rubbed the fur on his neck.

He slowed down and now was only walking. He wanted to hear what I was saying clearly.

"Can we go that beach?" I asked him. I wanted to talk with him in his human form, when he can reply to

me.

With a woof, he changed our direction and after a few minutes we reached the clearing and I could see

the beach now. He came to a stop near the shack and I slid down his back. He walked in the shack and

came back wearing a pair of shorts, his naked chest on display. The moon light shone on his chiselled

body and with this new eyesight, I felt like I was seeing him for the first time again. He was by far the

most beautiful man I had ever seen, inside and out.

And right now, I watched him as he was walking to be with a nervous yet guarded expression on his

face. As if one wrong move and I'd bolt. He came to a halt when he was a couple of feet away from me.

I gave him a small smile as I started removed the shirt that I was wearing and walked towards him.

Then, I kneeled in front of Nikolai, just like he was ordered me to in our room.