34
Part 34
“What do you want to know first?” Trent asked, running lazy fingers over the bare skin of my arm, causing pleasureable bumps to spread all over.
“Everything. I want to know everything about you.” I told him with a smile.
“That is something that you will get to know if you’ll spend more time with me.” He sent me a beautiful grin.
After agreeing to tell me everything, Trent took me back to the master bedroom where he made me lie down before joining me in bed, where he placed my head on his shoulder.
“I know, but I want to know as much as you can tell me. Why are you so…complicated? Why do you get angry when things don’t go your way?” I questioned.
“My mom died when I was a kid. Even though I barely knew her, I still remember how much she loved me and how much she spoiled me. When she died, my father tells me, that I lost my temper. Nobody was able to control me. I destroyed all my toys, everything. He even kept a few broken toys as evidence for me for when I grew up; that is how I know that I did indeed lose my temper.
“After her funeral, when everybody went on with their lives, I didn’t. My fury reached new heights, the servants in the house were terrified of me. Dad hired numerous nannies for me but none of them lasted for more than a few days.
“Years passed and my anger did not subside. I lost my anger over trivial things; so much so that one time I spilled a bowl of hot soup all over the maid just because it didn’t contain enough chicken. She was burned, had to be taken to the hospital.”
I winced at his words. What Trent was telling me was intense. A child experiencing anger this severe was something to be concerned about. I couldn’t imagine what his father must be going through.
“Why were you so angry?” I enquired.
“I felt like I’d lost everything. Kids cry when you take their favorite thing or person away from them. They get angry, they throw tantrums. When I got to know my mother, the woman I loved most in the world would never come back to me, I got angry; so angry that I failed to see the other people who were still with me. At that time, I just wanted my mom back. But she was never going to come back. Ever.”
Scooting closer to Trent, I wound an arm around his torso, holding him tightly against me. Losing someone you loved was not easy; and it never got easier. I knew how devastated Hailey was when her parents passed away, she didn’t eat anything for two weeks.
“Anyways, after I burned the maid, my father got concerned. I mean, he was concerned before, but after that day he was worried-enough to hire a therapist for me, because I was not only becoming a danger to myself, I was becoming a danger to others as well.
“The next few years were spent in severe therapy. My father decided that it would be best if I got a change of scenery because everything around me reminded me of my mother. So he sent me to a boarding school in Russia, meanwhile he built a new house for us.
“I got my higher education from Russia, and was going through therapy as well. My therapist told me how nothing was permanent and I had to learn to let go of things and a whole other load of bullshit which I don’t remember right now.”
“So did you listen to your therapist? Did you do what he or she asked you to do? Did you let go?” I interrupted him. I never knew Trent studied in Russia; maybe I’d ask him to say something to me in Russian.
“No bumblebee, I didn’t, I couldn’t. There was no way I could let go of my mother. But my fury was toned down considerably. I didn’t get angry as much, and if I did, I learnt to release it in a healthier…more appropriate manner.
“But no matter what happened, I knew one thing in my mind; that no matter what happened in my life, I never wanted to feel like that again. I never wanted to feel helpless and hopeless. I never wanted the world to think that I had a weakness, that there was something that they could take away from me if they wished to destroy me.”
“Is that why you are so controlling?” I knew the answer to this, but I still had to ask.
“Yes shady. This is exactly why I’m so controlling. I don’t want people to think that they can screw me over and get away with it. No, not at all. That is exactly why I am so controlling when it comes to you. I don’t want to lose you, sleeping beauty. That is why I keep pursuing you, keep pushing you into a corner so that you will accept that you are mine, that you can’t run from me,” Trent answered, placing a kiss on my forehead.
I didn’t know whether to be scared or flattered. But since my heart had won the war, I chose flattery over fear. I could understand why he behaved like a psychotic stalker; it wasn’t the right thing to do, but now that Trent told me why he was like this, I could understand.
“Then what happened, after you decided you want to control everything and everyone?” I asked.
“I came back to USA for college. My father was anxious when he came to pick me up from the airport. He got married to my step mom while I was away. My father did tell me he was planning to remarry. At first I didn’t want him to marry, but then I realized how lonely he would be and he needed someone as well. So I told him I had no problem with him marrying again. He married soon after. He did visit me in Russia, but only during Christmas. He didn’t even allow me to come home, choosing instead to come to Russia. But after a while he calmed down knowing that therapy had worked and I was no longer a destructive individual, and that I wouldn’t hurt his new wife.”
“I’m glad you got better,” I stated, not sure if it would make a difference to him.
“I’m glad I got better, too, shady. I feel guilty for putting my dad through so much,” Trent responded, remorse lacing his words.
“You were a kid, don’t blame yourself. Everybody has a way of coping, a way of channeling their pain, so it’s alright. I’m sure your father doesn’t hold it against you,” I replied.
“And I thought you flunked Psychology,” he muttered. I could tell he was rolling his eyes.
“Don’t change the subject. Tell me what happened when you were college,” I commanded.
Trent took a deep breath. “College years were…fun, if you can say that. I spent most of my time partying and socializing with my friends. I guess, college helped me a lot; gave me a new perspective on life and its twisted mysteries. There were girls, lots of girls…” He trailed off, letting the words sink in.
“Girlfriends?” I asked. Truth be told, I did not care about Trent’s past; because that’s where it was, in the past, history. However, my heart twinged with a burn, signalling jealousy.
“One night stands, or friends with benefits. You know how I said I didn’t ever want to feel helpless again, well this was why I barely had girlfriends. I couldn’t give them the emotional satisfaction they required. Sex was all I could offer. Because I didn’t want to fall, I didn’t want to care.” His fingers which were gliding up and down my arm settled on my stomach, but after a few seconds, they slipped under my shirt, touching me, igniting every nerve ending.
“So you never had a serious relationship?” I questioned, suddenly curious to know the answer.
“To be honest, I had no idea how to act in a relationship. Believe it or not, I’ve never been in a relationship, at least not any that lasted more than twenty four hours,” he answered.
My heart hooted and danced with joy upon hearing his answer. Trent never had a relationship. No woman who owned his heart. There was no one I had to worry about. My heart was safe with him because he didn’t know how to break hearts…at least I thought he didn’t.
“Okay, then what happened?” I queried.
“After college I applied for my Masters while helping dad with the business. Everyday after finishing up with my classes, I would help my dad out. And before I knew it, I had taken over the family business and had my own office on the top floor of the building.”
“That’s wonderful. I don’t know why but it makes me happy to know how you helped your father and eventually took over the business.” I told him. Now that I knew more about the man my heart had fallen far, I could see just how beautiful he really was. He was not perfect, but that’s how life molded him.
Trent chuckled. “Yes, he was glad, as well. He had this big smile in his face when he finally handed over the business to me; said that now he was finally free. But one can never be truly free of business. My dad worked on this company his whole life, no matter how much he tries to stay away, he can’t. He drops by frequently, asking me about the progress and all.”
“I’m glad to know you have a strong bond with your father,” I replied, sincerely.
“He is my one constant in life, I believe. He never left me, not even once. Yes, he sent me to Russia but that was for my own good. I’m glad that he is happy,” Trent stated, his fingers now running over my abdomen, causing me to bite my lip. This was not the right moment to moan in pleasure. But damn his fingers and their magic.
“So the business world made you ruthless?” I asked, wanting to divert my mind from his magical fingers.
“Yes. My father gave me full liberty to do whatever I wanted. And so I did. I hired and fired people at the snap of my fingers,” Trent responded.
“Then what happened?” I enquired.
Trent glanced to the left, locking his eyes with mine. “Then I met you.”
My cheeks heated as I gazed into his smoldering eyes. “Me?”
“Yes you, bumblebee. One evening was all it took. You did something no other woman had been able to do. I took one look at you and I felt the cracks in my heart heal. You made me feel, Amanda. You made me want to care for you, to make sure you stay near me all the time. I never wanted any other woman like that before. I never wanted to care, never wanted to feel. Yet, you made me care, you made me feel. You make me want to do so many things to you, I’m not sure how I’ve controlled myself for so long.” Trent kissed my nose.
His words made me speechless. I did not know what to say, and the blush on my cheeks was getting darker and darker by the minute. The sincerity in his words was unmistakable. Trent was telling the truth, causing my heart to combust with sheer joy. I didn’t realize how long I’ve waited to hear those words from him until he actually said them.
“Tell me more.” Was all I managed to say at the end.
“Well, when I first looked at you and my heart felt like it was healing, I wondered who you were and why haven’t I seen you before. Then you opened your mouth and insulted me, that was when I decided that you were going to be mine, in one way or another. You sealed your fate the moment you first insulted me, shady,” he informed me.
I had no idea Trent wanted me then. He insulted me, questioned my intellect. And wasted no opportunity to tell me how stupid I really was. I knew there was much, much more to him than what he’d just told me, but this fact nagged me, a lot.
“If you liked me then, then why did you insult me? You always said I was stupid, why?” I questioned. It still hurt whenever I recalled his harsh words.
“Even though I decided that you will be my woman, I still had to test you. I had to make sure you could handle me. I’m not an easy man to be with, sleeping beauty, you and I both know that. So I had to see if you were strong enough, mentally and physically for me. And I must say, you passed with flying colors.” With this statement, Trent kissed me lips.
“That is not fair. You hurt my feelings, scared me half to death, all because you wanted to test me?! You sir, are crazy,” I stated.
“I told you I’m not easy to get along with,” he argued.
“That is no excuse, Trent. You do not go around hurting people’s feelings, it’s not right. I mean, I know your circumstances were crap, but still. People have feelings, you have to consider them as well,” I replied.
“Are you getting angry?” Trent asked, his fingers going higher and higher, near my bra.
“No, just irritated. It hurt me so much when you called me stupid. And then you said I was not pretty and perfect to be in your magazines. I hated you so much. Then you left, just like that. Gone, for two years. And when you come back you act like I belong to you.
“I mean, when Theodore did this with Hailey, I found it hot. I know, I’m insane. I realized that after you did the same thing with me. Why would you cuff me to your bed, why?” I was babbling, there was no other explanation to the nonsense that left my lips. It was like I wanted Trent to know how badly he hurt me, and constantly rambling was the option I chose. I was crazy.
“Amanda?” He called me name, getting my full attention.Exclusive content © by Nô(v)el/Dr/ama.Org.
“What?” I frowned at him, still irritated over his past actions.
“Stop talking,” he ordered, his words like molten chocolate dripping over me.
“What if I don’t?” I asked him.
“Then I will kiss you until you forget everything you have to say to me,” he replied.
Those words were enough to shut me up. Trent had the uncanny ability to shut me up with his words, and at the same time have desire pooling in my nether regions. That man was a magician.
“Yeah well-” he didn’t let me finish. Trent took my lips in a raw, passionate kiss. His kisses were nothing new to me, although they still turned me on like never before. But the only difference in this kiss was that…
His hand was under my shirt, touching places I only imagined in the darkest of my fantasies.