On Fire

Chapter 7 A Joke Made by God

I lived in a small unit on the eighth floor of Block A. It was a simple unit with a single living room and

bedroom, and the monthly rental was two thousand yuan.

When I reached the second floor, I saw my mother standing by the door with a horrified expression. Her

eyes were swollen, indicating the chance that she had just cried. With my heart sinking, I moved

towards her uneasily.

“Mum, why are you here?”

“Jessica, Daniel is sick now with neonatal sepsis, which was caused by his high fever. He’s currently

being operated on in the hospital, and I couldn’t reach your phone all the time, so I could only come

here. Why are you home at this late hour? Were you working overtime just now?”

“Yes, it has been busy for me in the company. Mum, which hospital is Daniel staying in?”

I lied to her face, which made me feel bad.

Daniel was an accident that happened last time when I was framed. At that time, I planned to abort

him, since I wasn’t married yet. However, the doctor had given me a verdict, telling me that the wall of

my womb was too thin. If I had aborted a child that time, the probability of me getting pregnant again

was close to zero.

Hence, I had given birth to that child although I wasn’t married, and I had named him Daniel.

My father’s condition worsened because of this, and in the end he left us because he couldn’t be

saved. Later on, I used all of my savings and bought a two-bedroom unit in the countryside and took

my mother there so that she could take care of the child.

My mother wasn’t literate her whole life, so she was a woman without her own opinions. She never dug

deep into my life and my work. During the time when my child was just born, in the span of just a few

months, all of my savings were almost gone. Therefore, I had to work after my month of confinement in

childbirth.

I studied interior design when I was in university, and my mother always thought that I was working in a

foreign corporate, never suspecting anything. I hoped that she would never learn of the truth forever so

that she could live in peace.

The phone number I had given him did not belong to the company, and I had left the phone at home.

This was because I was afraid that once the others there knew of the existence of my child, they would

start spreading nonsense.

All the while, I thought that giving birth to Daniel was out of my choice because it was such an accident

and I never anticipated his arrival in the first place. However, the moment I knew that he was sick, I

somehow felt fearful!

In the end, slowly but surely, I learnt to become a mother.

I pulled along my mother as we jogged on the streets, but there wasn’t many taxis now. We had to

tread along the road for a while before seeing one, and I almost pounced onto it just to stop it.

While we were on the way, my mother couldn’t stop crying as she blamed herself for Daniel’s condition.

She had been saying that Daniel wouldn’t be sick if it were not for her carelessness.

I turned to face the window as I secretly wiped off my tears. How could I blame her? He was a lonely

old hag who had come to M City to take care of my child. She had done everything in her power for me.

Moreover, who could compare to me in terms of being cruel? I had left Daniel after only one month of

his life, and he was almost four months old now, but the times when I went back to visit him could be

counted on one hand.

I got myself extremely drunk at the club, and I only returned home at dawn with an alcoholic scent all

over me. The next day, I emerged from my place at night, and repeated the same cycle all over again.

Every time I got a hold of real money, that was when I felt that everything turned from being surreal to Text property © Nôvel(D)ra/ma.Org.

reality. Only when I had money that Daniel and mother could live a good life.

I only went back home once every two weeks, and after accompanying Daniel for a day or two, I would

return to work. Every time, he would stare at me curiously, and there was an innocent smile on his face.

I always found myself speechless every time I laid eyes on his face.

My life was painful but there was still something to be happy about!