Inevitably Yours

QUINN

My dad was angry to find me outside in the morning. My mom laughed it off and was probably the only reason I retained a modicum of freedom.

I trudged into band practice, not at all excited to face the whispers that were bound to follow me after Michael and I interacted at the parade. Christy intercepted me before I even got to the instrument lockers to grab my things.

“Why didn’t you say anything?” she started with no preamble.

“About what?” I played dumb.

“Quinn, how do you possibly know Michael and to the extent that he was expecting to spend time with you?” she said. Her voice had a hint of concern in it.

“Why does it matter?” I asked her. I honestly wanted to know why everyone cared so much. Sure, he was the next Alpha, but how was his social life any different from anyone else’s.

“He just… isn’t nice to girls like you,” she said carefully.

“Girls like me?” I raised an eyebrow. She looked like she didn’t want to say what was on my mind. “What stupid? Virgins? Like me how?” I snapped. She winced slightly.

“I don’t think you’re stupid. He’s just particularly good at breaking hearts, okay? I don’t want to see the same thing happen to you,” she said softer now.

“Shouldn’t that be my choice? Clearly, I’ve heard the rumors and warnings,” I barked.

Christy took a step back, hurt coming over her face. “I got to get my poles,” she muttered and ran off. I sighed, my shoulders dropping. I grabbed my things and went to an area of the chairs where no one else was. I slowly put my sax together, feeling bad that I snapped at her now. She had tried really hard to be my friend, and she was just looking out for me.

I thought back to everything Michael said the night before. It was so hard to reconcile that Michael with the heartless playboy everyone made him out to be. It had to be a mask, a front he put up to keep people from really knowing him. Maybe making friends didn’t make him nervous but giving people the truth about himself did.

The whistle blew, and we were all called to gather for warm-up. I took my usual position at the end of the line. When the director called out that chairs four and five needed to switch for our section, my head snapped to Stuart instantly. He was looking forward, but I could see his jaw clenching.

After moving around a few other people, we were given out set assignments for the year’s performance show. The packet was thick, and it took the director a solid twenty minutes to explain how it worked to the new faces.Content (C) Nôv/elDra/ma.Org.

I flipped through the packet, hoping I grasped the concept at least. Mitch leaned over and looked at my assignment. “You don’t have much luck, do you? The Alpha sets his eyes on you as his next prize, and then you get placed next to Stuart, who hates your guts, for the rest of the year,” he observed. I turned to him in horror.

“What?” I asked. He grabbed my packet and flipped it closed. He pointed to my little dot, then the one next to it.

“That is me,” he said. He moved his finger to the other side of my dot. “But that is our section leader. You will pretty much be next to him in every set as the sections move together for the most part. That means until the season is over, you and he better learn to tolerate each other.”

Mitch went back to his packet, flipping through all the pages. “Today just can’t get any worse,” I whispered.

“So, it’s true? You’re sleeping with the Alpha’s son?” he asked casually.

“Wha…” I turned my whole body to him. He looked up at me with disinterest.

“I don’t care what you do,” he said. “I just didn’t quite believe the rumors from Founder’s Day. You don’t exactly look the type, but you were running off together.”

“Rumors?” I asked, frightened about what he was going to say. We were directed to head out to the field, but I didn’t let the subject drop. I fell in line next to Mitch, looking at him expectantly.

“The usual garb. Mainly that you were spreading your legs to get in good with him. Everyone was confused about his girlfriend or last one, though. With it being summer, no one knew they broke up, I guess.”

I went silent. I felt sick. School hadn’t even begun, and I was being branded some slut. Mitch gave me a wary look as we lined up on the field.

“Look, don’t worry about it. Someone else will catch his attention in a couple of weeks, and the drama will shift. It’s all superfluous and menial. A month from now, no one will remember you were the first of the year.”

His words did nothing to assuage the panic and fear inside of me. How had things gotten so completely turned around?

–

During the break, I tried calling one of my friends. I needed to talk to someone; I needed someone to understand what was really happening. No one picked up, and I pushed away my lunch, unable to stomach it. Christy caught my eye from across the room. She gave me a sympathetic look before pointing toward the flag storage room. When she walked that way, I knew what she was trying to offer.

I met her inside, and her face was tight. “Are you okay?” she asked.

I shook my head; I wasn’t okay. Last night, I thought I was; I thought everything was going to work itself out. Michael was so honest and sweet last night. He made me feel secure with him like he could shield me from all the stupid things that could try to hurt me. Part of me even thought it was a little worth getting grounded to have gotten that time with him.

But he couldn’t shield me when he was providing the ammunition.

“I’m not sleeping with him,” I told her. She nodded her head.

“I believe you,” she said. “You just have to understand who he is….”

“But he isn’t. Not my Michael. He isn’t this playboy, heart-breaking monster everyone seems to think he is,” I argued.

“You’ve known him for like a second,” she said gently. “The rest of us have been around him for years. It just is what it is. She-wolves come around thinking he will change for them or they are that special one. It ends the same every time.”

I could tell by the look on her face that she didn’t like having to tell me this. I could feel tears stinging my eyes. “What do I do?”

She pulled me into a tight hug. “You should probably keep your head down and stay away from him. I know how he can be and how tempting it is. Take it from experience; push him away now.”

I shook my head into her shoulder. I couldn’t push him away. I knew it was futile to try. We stood like that, hugging each other in the silence of the flag room with the hum of a hundred classmates having lunch outside the room. Finally, she held me by my shoulders at arm’s length.

“When he decides to start showing up, just stick close to me. Stuart and Michael hate each other because-” she stopped abruptly, her cheeks reddening. “Well, they don’t get along. I’ll ask Stu to be nice to you again. There is a couple of other cute girls in your grade that might catch his attention before school starts.”

“I’ll think about it,” I told her with a half-smile. I got what she was trying to do; she was trying to shield me from him so I could be spared any more rumors and embarrassment. I didn’t know if I wanted that, though, and it made me feel like I would have to choose between Michael and the friends I was making, like Christy.

“Come on, we can’t hide in here forever,” she smiled. I nodded. She led the way out of the room, but I declined her off to hang out until break was over. I went back to my stuff and grabbed my water bottle. I pulled out my phone, but before I could think about sending Michael a message, Sandra came stalking over to me.

“You’ve got a lot of nerve; you know that,” she snapped. I looked at her in confusion; I really didn’t know what I had done to incite her anger.

“Come again?” I asked softly.

“If you think sleeping with a senior gets you anywhere, think again,” she spat.

“Who told you I slept with a senior?” I tried to defend.

“You pretty ones are always the worst. You think you are so above your place,” Sandra said, putting her hand on her h*p. “Just stay away from Michael and the rest of the seniors if you have any self-respect.” She stormed away, and I just watched her, no less confused than I was before.

I closed my eyes and loosed a breath. I wanted to be anywhere but here right now. I wanted to rewind to the previous night even before Michael kissed me. I heard someone approach and sit in the chair next to me. I g*****d, not knowing how much more I could put up with.

“If you’ve come to comment and berate me about sleeping with the Alpha’s son, you can just go away,” I muttered.

“Oh, I know that isn’t true,” a female laughed next to me. I opened my eyes and looked at her. I recognized her as one of the drum girls. “I’m Sunni Rae.”

“Hi,” I said, nodding. “Quinn.”

“Cute name,” Saph thought.

“I felt kinda bad watching you. Sandra’s a b***h, but only because she is jealous,” she said.

“Not sure what to be jealous of,” I told her. “I didn’t do anything to anyone.”

She shrugged. “You are probably the least weird of the freshman.” Her eyes darted to my hair, but I could tell she was too polite to ask. “And it’s clear you can actually do something with your instrument. You’ll find there are people in this room that take this stuff super seriously because they don’t excel at it easily.”

I looked around the room. I had noticed some people, even upperclassmen, concentrated harder than others or seemed to struggle a little. “Why in the world is a junior jealous of me?” I asked.

“One, Stuart keeps eyeing you. Whether it’s contempt or something else doesn’t matter. He isn’t paying attention to her. Even Christy knows about Sandra’s little crush,” she explained. “And two, Michael turned Sandra down last year and chose a prettier freshman. She has been a tad bitchy since.”

“Wait, so she liked him, and he told her no, he wouldn’t date her?” I clarified.

“Yep,” Sunni said. “If you thought joining band would be the least dramatic high school activity, you were sorely mistaken. Plus, you somehow ended in the lap of the center of the brunt of it, and I feel like that is both figurative and literal.”

“We haven’t slept together!” I said.

She threw her hands up. “No judgment. But there is a reason why so many girls get up in their fur about him.”

“Thanks for the warning,” I said, slinking back down in the chair.

“Do you want to come hang out with the bass line? We are tryout only, so we generally don’t get new freshmen, and I’m one of two girls on the whole line,” she said. Her face was warm and sincere. She didn’t care about the rumors and was extending an offer of friendship.

“Uh, sure,” I said with a small smile. Sunni stood up and offered me a hand. I grabbed it and followed her down to the rest of her friends, all sitting around the large round drums that provided the steady rhythm of our music.

“Guys, this is Quinn, and no, she’s not f*****g Michael,” Sunni introduced me. My mouth dropped open as all the guys in the group started to bust out with laughter.

“You’re kinda tiny,” one said. “Are you even a wolf?”

“Be nice, Tommy,” Sunni scowled. He stood to his full height and offered me his hand.

“Sorry,” he smiled cheekily. “I’m Tom; you can call me Tommy if you want.”

I shook his hand. “Thanks,” I said.

“That’s Matt, and that one is Aaron,” Sunni said, pointing to people in turn. When she finished introducing everyone, they returned to their conversation only to be interrupted by the whistle.

–

I managed to keep my head down for the rest of practice and slip out without any more unpleasant interactions. My mom was waiting in the parking lot to pick me up. I didn’t feel much like talking, so I slipped into the backseat and put my headphones in my ears. When we got home, I went straight to my room. I fell on top of my bed and buried my face in my pillow.

My whole body felt heavy, and an uncomfortable sensation played over my skin. I wanted the bed to swallow me up, so I didn’t have to deal with this anymore. All I could hope was at the end of the week, Michael wouldn’t be busy with his family stuff.