Chapter 111
Oh, please. Don’t give up your life, Ivan. I still need you. No …
“Clear!” the doctor shouted.
You were important in my life so you can’t die yet.
“Again, clear!”
I saw his body lift when he was hit by an electric shock.
“Once more! Clear!”
Damn it, you’re not going to leave me, were you? You love me, Ivan! You can’t leave me!
“We’ll try it again! Clear!”
You will not be able to see how our kids grow up so please, fight with it! Don’t just give up!
“Last one!” the doctor suddenly said so I was immediately alarmed. Last one? But the line in the machines still flat! No! “Clear!” those two parts of the defibrillator stuck to Ivan’s chest again.
“SHIT!” Creed’s sudden cry was obviously startled.
I, on the other hand, was sitting on the floor because I was so weak.
I saw it. It’s still on flat line.
He’s gone.
Rigella Andrea’s POV
I smiled as I saw his smiling face in a picture that was placed in a frame. It’s been a long time since I saw him smile. This picture, somehow, showed it to me. The smile that can melt my heart in an instant. The angelic smile that caught my attention years ago.
No wonder, I fell in love with him so deep like an ocean. I feel like I’m drowning because of being so much in love with him. No matter how much I want to go up, I can’t. I was destined to fall in love with him. And I also think that he was the only one who I will only love even in my after life.
Though, I know it’s quite impossible, I’m still wishing for it because … I can’t imagine myself loving someone else other than him. He was my one and only great love. He fully occupied my heart and up until now, he still does. No one can replace him even the most perfect man that might enter my life.
My love for him was eternal, to make it short. He inflicted me pain and anger that I shouldn’t have felt in the first place. But still, he’s the only one who can extinguish those pain and anger that I felt. He was like a medicine to me. He can heal me easily just with his smile and sweet words that he’s giving me.
I composed myself before I moved the swing that I’m sitting on right now. Even though I am not with him now, I can feel his presence by visiting the playground where we first met. This was located in the subdivision that our house stands into. I also wonder why Ivan chose to live in the same subdivision of this playground. He’s the one who picked our house.
I hugged the picture frame and looked up at the sky. The clouds were blue and white in color while the sun was shining brightly. It was a great day to start the day for some people but for me, it’s still not enough. It’s still not enough for me to remove the sadness that covers my heart and soul. I”m still sad because I”m not with him now. I would only be happy when I saw him open his eyes and look at me enthusiastically.
But I know it’s impossible. I have to accept that I will never be able to be with him again in this special place. Even though it’s hard for me, I’ll still try. Nothing will happen in my life if I don’t accept that. And I know he won’t like it too when my whole being was only covered with a deep sadness. I need to stand up for my children and the people who were still beside me and still love me.
The cold air caressed my body. That affected my hair so I grabbed it and moved it to my left shoulder. was he that wind? Did he touch me? If so, I hope he can also read what my brain says for him. That I love him so much and I can no longer love anyone other than him.
I smiled and looked at his photo again. He looks so happy that time. What could be the reason for his pleasure in that picture? I want to know it because there were only few things that makes him happy.
Ivan was a mysterious person so he was not easy for other people to read. He’s like a mystery book that has lots of confusing chapters and pages that an ordinary person can’t figure out. But I, I already know him very well. From head to toe. Though, now that I just found out other things about him I’m still proud that he doesn’t have any secrets that I don’t know yet.
Creed told me that I was Ivan’s first love. I was still confused at those times because I could not understand what he said. I mean, all along, I believed that Lara was his first love but the truth was, It was me. He told Creed that it was only me he loved.
I tried to ask him how’s and why’s but he said that it’s a long story to tell. He was also afraid to answer those questions of mine because he was also afraid to disappoint Ivan. He said that he promised to him that no one would know that secret of my husband other than Creed. End of the story.
I was happy, yes. But it could have been more happy if he’s the one who confessed it to me. I want him to explain why, how and when he loved me. I want to know what he liked about me. I wanted to know why I was the only one he was able to love despite the people we weren’t together with.
Ivan … was indeed a one woman man. That”s what Mommy Jane told me before Ivan and I were married. I was confused then because I knew that Ivan and Lara were still in a relationship then and I also knew that Mommy Jane knew that. But he still told me that and I don’t know exactly why.
But now I know. He only loved no one but me. Whatever he had done to me before, you gradually erased what I learned. But still, I can’t understand why he needed to hurt me immensely. I still can’t guess what the reason was. I’m confused.
But no matter what it was, I have forgiven him for all the hurt he has done to me. The conversation was over. What matters was now.
‘too much sun was bad for a pregnant woman.” suddenly a voice said so I was a little embarrassed in my seat.
My gaze shifted to my back. It was Roxanne wearing a red dress and staring at me. To me, it looks like this woman was going to preach to me again.
I smiled at him sweetly. “Hey, Roxy.” I said when he could get close to me.
“Hey, Roxy your face. What were you doing here and you’re exposed to the sun, huh? You’re a pregnant woman, jusko.” he shook his promise as he looked at my chubby stomach.
I just smiled at him again and stroked my stomach. I’m five months pregnant, by the way. I didn’t expect to get pregnant because I had an ovarian complication when I gave birth to the twins but here I am and I am pregnant now. God gave another blessing again.
“Let’s go to your OB? You’re still being checked up.” Roxanne held out her hand to me.
I accepted that and slowly got up from sitting on the swing. Roxanne also helped me stand up. The frame I had been holding earlier remained in my hand. It’s from Ivy. He was said to have taken this photo of Ivan himself. That explains why the picture was perfect in my eyes. I’m speechless.
“Let’s go.” I was with him but I winced when I felt my child kicking in my womb. He’s really restless in recent days.
“What? were you okay, best?” Roxanne asked worriedly.
I nodded softly. “I’m just okay. Baby just kicked.” I smiled and caressed my stomach. I hope you will get your father’s appearance and attitude, baby.
“Ah, that’s really it. It’s been five months.” he also caressed my stomach. “Seriously, what? Ivan was also really a sharp shooter. were you kidding me? You’re still pregnant by being beaten up.” laughed Roxanne.
“Don’t! My son can still hear you. You’re still insulting his father.” I laughed a little.
“Hey, best! That baby hasn’t come out of your stomach yet. Can I hear that? Letse, come on.” he nailed and touched my hand. He has already walked so he has taken me to walk as well.
“I’m excited to know your baby’s gender, Roxy …” I said smiling from the absence. “I hope he’s a man so he can be Ivan’s junior.”
“Ivan the second really, best? Can’t you feel too consumed by that?” Roxanne looked at me for a moment before looking at him again.
“It’s okay for me to consume as long as he’s Ivan’s junior. I don’t care if he’s still his daddy. I’ll still accept him because he’s my son.” I answered.This content is © NôvelDrama.Org.
“Edi, Rayne was the only woman? Seriously, three men will protect my child. It’s hard to court.”
“Correction, Roxy. They’re four. With Ivan.” I corrected what he said.
He took a deep breath. “But it’s best, you know-“