I Am The Luna

VALERIE.

I gasp, jolting upright, my entire body drenched in sweat. My heart is palpitating wildly, and I press my fist against my chest as I scan the room once again.

I’m safe. I’m alone. I’m alive…

But those words aren’t calming the anxiousness inside of me. I get out of bed, last night replaying in my head and I stop a few steps out of the door.

The body!

Oh my god! Someone was killed here!

I jump back staring at the floor. There was blood! There was blood!

I sniff the air but not even a hint of the smell of blood is left in the air.

I look at my hands and wrists, but the bruises have healed.

Glancing around the room, it looks just like it did when I had fallen asleep before

I had awoken to all that crap, there is not a trace of the horror that had taken place.

Zade had done something to make me fall asleep…

Great… I needed his help. Once again, I was unable to defend myself.

All the training and it was for nothing.

Why am I so weak?

I walk quickly to the bathroom, wanting to wash away the memories of the night before. I pull off my shirt and switch on the shower as my thoughts swirl rapidly in my head, giving way to a crushing headache.

I’m always the weak one from all the Blood Borns. Zaia has always been incredibly strong… Sebastian, Atticus, Zade, even Gaultier… only me.

I was and still am the weakest in the triquetras.

Always will be. Why though?

Why?!

I step into the shower, feeling that the water temperature is a little hot, but I don’t bother adjusting it as I stand there, consumed by my thoughts.

Why am I so useless?

Why… Content property of NôvelDra/ma.Org.

It’s getting harder to breathe.

The way the man’s shadowed body hovered over mine… the way he had pinned my wrists to the bed.

He was going to rape me.

My stomach churns and I swallow hard, feeling repulsed.

I turn, my arm knocking into the shower level, sending a sting of pain through my elbow.

I’m not safe anywhere.

I slide down the shower wall.

Valerie the weak.

That’s me.

Useless.

Fuck why…

Where am I going wrong?

I twist my hands into my hair as the water begins getting hotter.

But the thought is far away in my mind, as last night plays and replays in my mind like a reel that is on repeat.

Zade, if he wasn’t there….

The body!

Where’s the body?

There was a body!

Is it under the bed?

What did Zade do to it?

What if someone finds out?

What if someone comes for me again?

The next time… will I survive?

The scalding water is burning my skin, but I feel too sick to get up.

The steam is making it harder to breathe, too.

Weak.

I’m weak.

Stupid.

So fucking stupid.

I grip my head, rocking slightly, feeling useless.

Next time, I won’t be so lucky. I’ll be dead.

I should have checked properly, I’m supposed to be stronger than this!

I punch the tiles in anger, a whimper escaping me.

Useless! I’m useless!

Suddenly the shower door opens but I feel far away.

No one’s here.

I’m imagining things again.

I gasp, hearing the low growl as I’m yanked to my feet and cold water suddenly pours down on me, making me hiss.

A scream escapes me, only for a hand to clamp over my mouth. I struggle, lashing out at my assaulter.

“Let

go of me!” I shout. “Let me out!”

But he refuses to let go, forcing me to stay under the cold shower.

“Look at me.” The dangerous snarl snaps me out of my thoughts but no matter how much I struggle, he continues to hold me under the icy water, a jarring change to the burning hot water prior. “Don’t fight me, you will not win.”

I look up, my hair in my face and through the wet strands, I realise it’s Zade.

But his words hammer in my head. I will not win. I won’t… If someone wants, they can do whatever they want to me…

Last night’s gunshots go off in my head and I shiver.

Without thinking, I grab onto his hoodie and yank him closer with all my energy. My heart beats erratically as he slams his hands against the wall behind me, the water drenching him completely.

“Where’s the body?” I whisper, panic rising within me again.

He doesn’t move, his face emotionless as he watches me.

Is this a game for him?!

“What if someone finds out! Because of you, I’ll be thrown into prison too!” I hiss, my voice trembling as I begin hitting his chest, feeling suffocated.

This all went wrong!

“Breathe.” He commands.

I can’t!

I-

When suddenly his arms wrap around me, holding me in a crushing hug and I’m no longer able to hit his chest. I struggle but I’m unable to move in his arms and soon I still.

My thumping heart slowly calms down and I close my eyes, finding strange solace in his embrace.