Her, To Home

He was unaware of the silence around him. The cold wind was also ignored as he stared at the dark sky unconsciously. When his mind was on her, he never saw anything else anyway so there was no point of ignoring it. It was her he was seeing, Sara. Sara O’Brian. Always her.

Last night went worse than the morning, he screwed up, again. He had promised he will keep his temper at bay, he didn’t. He promised he will not touch her, he did, more time than he could count. He promised he will not get possessive, yeah, he sure kept that together and lastly, he had sworn he will not kiss her.

He snorted internally, that was just a too much of a fucking crazy joke. He thought he had it under control, knew he was fine. Was sure that if he did touch her accidentally, he will not lose it. He was in control of himself.

Control his ass.

But Jesus, he couldn’t help it. He wanted to kiss her again and again but the second she starts talking crap about herself, he lost it. How could she even think that? She wasn’t clingy, he was. He was the one who was always stuck to her like leach, always over reacting towards everything. She wasn’t childish, far from it, she was simply beautiful.

But it didn’t come as a surprise that she thought that. What else was he expecting? She was Sara O’Brian, she was insecure and hell the way he left, any girl, no matter how confident would feel like trash.

Sara O’Brian wasn’t trash, not even close. She was the beginning and end of his reasons of leaving and now, for coming back.

He felt someone watching him and he moved his head and met the eyes of Drake. He was staring at him from across the empty park. When their eyes met, Drake start walking towards him and while reaching him, sat beside him.

“Why are you back?” His first question.

“People keep asking me this, like it isn’t obvious.” Dean answered while again turning his gaze away from the searching eyes on him.

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Dean didn’t answer back but laid back on the damp grass, staring at the black sky.

“You kissed her.” Drake stated.

“I…. I lost control.” his voice didn’t hold an ounce of regret.

“No shit.”

“Does everyone know?”

“They caught in on video.”

“Can I have it?”

“You are so full of it, Dean.”

He waited for a while and then said, “Well?”

“No, you cannot have the damn video!” Drake snapped at his frustrating friend.

“Pity.” Dean actually believed it was.

“It’s a wonder Sara survived with you as long as she did, you have become more unbearable.”

Dean didn’t answer. There wasn’t really an answer to give because Sara simply didn’t have a choice. She was his, for now and for as long as she breathes and if he could help it, even afterwards too. It didn’t matter if she thought him unbearable, possessive or annoying.

“Did you meet your parents?” Drake asked after a long silence. The wind has seemed to died down and the silence was disturbing him.

“No.”

“Why the fuck not?”

“I didn’t come back for them.”

“No, you came back to make sure O’Brian was still single and to renew your claim, remind everyone she is not to be touched.” Drake couldn’t keep the anger away from his tune, he wanted to but he knew Dean was on blame, in one way or another, it was his fault about the life Sara have lived.

“That is not why I came but if this is the message going around then I can’t complain.” Dean tune didn’t change but Drake didn’t notice the tiny twitch of lips which was a proof that he was glad, more than glad.

“For this message to go around, you didn’t need to come back! It is an unspoken rule Dean, nobody touches her, your claims are on her like she is your fucking dog!”

“I can assure you she’s anything but that.”

“This is all you have to say on this? For God sake Dean, she couldn’t do anything normal teenagers do, couldn’t go to parties, couldn’t date, boys ran a mile when they see her. One guy, one guy had the guts to ask her out and did you know what happened to him? Of course, you fucking do, you made someone beat the shit out of him.”

“I didn’t make anyone beat the shit out of him.”

“Don’t lie to me!”

“I am not.”

Drake stared at the relaxed face of his friend, trying to figure it out. He knew Dean had everything to do with the beating. People had warned the poor kid that Sara was a ‘No!’ but he thought himself too tough and he paid for it too.

When he finally figured it out, he frowned and said, “You beat him yourself didn’t you?”

“Of course.”

Of course, Dean beat him himself. Where Sara was concerned, he didn’t send his men to do the job, he did it himself and from two years he needed those reason to see her, just a peak of her face to make him last few fights he was fighting.

“That is all you have to say? You took away her freedom!” Drake wasn’t shouting but he might as well have because his voice had echoed in the silence of night.

“No, I didn’t. She never liked parties and if she wanted to go, she would have. I never did anything to stop her and as for dating then kids around here should be damn well glad that they stayed back because I really didn’t want to skin someone.” Dean’s voice in answer was as casual as he was talking about the weather.

“You are twenty-one.”

“She’ll be eighteen in a month.”

“And then what? You will make sure she falls for you and then leave?!”

“In a way, yes.”

“You worthless piece of shit.”

Dean didn’t answer. Nobody except Sara can demand answers from him and the irony? She was the only one who never asked him anything because she simply didn’t think he owned her that.

Drake calmed himself down and asked quietly, “Tell me, honestly. Why are you here?”

Dean was silent for a long time, not thinking but trying to form words, right words but really, they were as simple as they could get.

“I’m going to take her with me.”

“You fucking crazy bastard!”

“I will not leave without her.” for the first time since they have start talking, Dean voice wasn’t emotionless or casual but firm and clear. In a way it was like a dare to anyone to speak against it.

“You want to get her killed.”

“I will never let her get hurt.” Dean growled. He was losing his temper, this topic always made him go on an edge, probably because a part of him feared, feared what will Sara say or if she would be willing.

“Yeah, you had done enough of that already, it’s not like it can get any worse.”

“It was either that or watch her die, that was unacceptable for me so I took the choice I had.” Dean voice was iron hard.

Again, the silence stretched between them but Drake still had one more question, a question which had to be answered. A need to know which he wanted to hear from Dean’s own mouth.

“What changed?”

Dean finally looked at him and stared for a long time and then rose up to start walking away. Drake thought that he wouldn’t get an answer but he could swear he heard Dean say, “I couldn’t live any longer.”