Chapter 60
Forever In The Past And Forever In The Future By Neener Chapter 60
Milo’s POV
“You were right, Bronx. You made things more stressful for her and it triggered a vision. We have a lead on his next move. I have a team going to stakeout the dress shop to see if he shows and the team on the northern border has been given instructions to leave a gap in patrols. It‘s only a matter of time,” I say, reading of m y tablet.
Bronx takes a drag off his cigarette as he paces like a caged wolf and with all things considered, he is. He has been intentionally keeping himself away from Kas. He had a theory that unfamiliar, stressful situations would trigger one of her visions and he was right. The night h e told me about his theory, we stupidly decided to use a version of an interrogation tactic we used in the military on POWs. Basically, we slowly took away things that mattered to Kas and made her uncomfortable until she broke down. Aside from the obvious
boke down. Aside from the obvious
danger to her mental health, the other problem is, it was also breaking him down.
We started by taking away Bronx. Limiting the time he spends with her. It was his idea. It was tough on both of them, especially since Saint and Lex had both just came back. It‘s tough watching your best friend try not to self–destruct. I had seen him at his worst after he was discharged from the military, but this was different. To offset what he is going through, he throws himself into work and personally oversees all interrogations of rogues breaching pack territory. He is a little sick in the head that way. 2
Next, he told Mrs. Miller he doesn‘t want Kas in the kitchens. He used the excuse that he needed her to focus on other things. If Mrs. Miller needed more assistance in the kitchens, he would assign more omegas to her staff.
After that, we took away her personal connections. Bronx sends the entire pack a mind link telling them that Kas has been stressed out and they need to steer
haen stressed out and they need to steer clear of her to avoid upsetting her further. She is not to assist with any work, not even if she volunteers. We don‘t even tell Ashley or Lenora. The whole pack loves her so much, they will d o anything to make sure she is alright. The only exception is Delilah. Bronx assigns her to keep Kas busy during the day. She doesn‘t like deceiving her friend but it does help her keep an eye on Kas‘s mental state. That way we know we won‘t take it too far. She says Kas seems a little sad and frayed on the edges, so the plan i s working. Thank Goddess, because the next step was to take Delilah away. I don‘t know if I would have let Bronx go that far. It would have been too cruel. 1
Since the fire, the number of rogues trying to get on pack territory has skyrocketed. We‘re now arresting three o r four a day. Most refuse to tell us why they‘re trying to trespass. A few are too scared and cave. They insist they are after the Luna, but they don‘t know her name o reven what she looks like. Even still, they won‘t tell us who sent them regardless of how badly Bronx tortures them. They‘re a diversion but we don‘t know what for only exactly. One of them slips some
owly exactly. One of them slips some information about breaching our Northern border but that is all we get before he dies of blood loss. Bronx and I set up a war room in the conference room, trying to predict where attacks would come from and what was near those areas outside the territory.
“Listen Bronx, now that Kas has had a vision and we have a semblance of a plan, go spend time with her. Remind her how much she means to you. Besides, it‘s Valentine‘s day. Don‘t spend it with a bunch of smelly rogues in an interrogation room. It‘s already nine p.m. Lenora‘s flight just landed, so we are going to a late movie.”
“What?”
“What, what? What part did you not hear? It‘s Valentine‘s day. Go spend time with your mate.”
His eyes widened, “Valentine‘s day?”
“Yeah, maybe you heard of it. Hearts, chocolates, baby angels shooting arrows a t your ass, you know...love,” I even make little fluttering motions with my hands to get it through his thick head.
it through his thick head.
“I lost track of the days. She made dinner...Fuck.”
Without another word, he picks up his keys and sprints out of the room.
“Love you too, Bronxy!” I call out as his footsteps pound down the hallway.
Bronx‘s POV
I pull into the parking lot of the closest grocery store. There are three scraggly bouquets and a few boxes of sampler chocolates. I grab one of each and rush back out. 2
Fuck fuck fuck. When I first met Kas, I told her as long as I didn‘t fuck up, she would be Luna of Blood River. Welp, this i s it. This is the part where I fuck things u p. She is never going to forgive me. This i s supposed to be our first Valentine‘s day and I forgot
I make my way as quickly as possible up t o my apartment. I stand at the door with the flowers and chocolates, My palms are sweaty. Why am I nervous to go into my own apartment?
“Cause you know you fucked up. That‘s
own apartments
“Cause you know you fucked up. That‘s why,” Saint snarls at me.NôvelD(ram)a.ôrg owns this content.
“Uh, Alpha, I think I heard her crying earlier but she didn‘t come out and ask for help, so I left her alone like you said t 0,” Marco informs me. He looks guilty for not doing more for her.
“Thanks, Marco,” I sigh and crack open the door. I don‘t see or hear anything so I go in and quietly close the door behind m e. I look at my watch, almost ten o‘clock. The bedroom door is closed.
Other than a binder and a few bridal magazines on the coffee table, the place i s spotless. If she made dinner, she cleaned it up hours ago. I walk over to take a peek at the binder. Something sparkles, catching my eye. Sitting on top o f the bridal magazine next to the binder is Kas‘s engagement ring.
What the Hell? Why did she take it off?
Oh shit. Fear and regret suddenly fill my chest, making it difficult to breathe. I set the flowers and chocolates down.
“See what you did, dummy? She hates us now!” Saint snarls again, pacing in my head.
I sigh and rub my hands over my face. I‘m such an idiot.
I pick up the ring and place half way down on my pinky finger so I don‘t lose track of it until I can convince her to put i t back on. I open the door to the bedroomt o find Kas lying fast asleep on the bed snuggled with her old green and gray blanket. Her nose is red and her eyes are puffy from crying herself to sleep. 2
I gently sit down beside her and brush her bangs out of her face. I‘m completely torn on whether to let her sleep in peace o r wake her up and beg for forgiveness. I roll the dice and kiss her cheek, hovering closely over her as she rolls toward me and slowly opens her eyes.
I immediately see the pain in her eyes and I feel it in my chest.
“I‘m sorry I‘m late, Baby. I should have called,” I apologize quietly brushing my nose against her cheek so I can breathe in her fresh rain and lilac scent.
ner fresh rain and lilac scent.
I feel a wet tear touch the tip of my nose. I sit up and see she is crying again.
“Bronx,” she sits up and hiccups as she tries to speak, before I realize it, she turns hysterical, “In the morning, I‘m going to ask Ashley to assign me a house i n town and I‘m going to get a job off territory. No one wants me here. You don‘t even want me here and–and I‘m sorry I couldn‘t be the mate to make you happy. I‘m sorry I couldn‘t be the Luna that Blood River deserves. I can search for a new pack. I dont want to be a rogue but I‘m just as useless and weak as Alpha Graham always told me I was. I–...”
She says more but she is sobbing so hard I can‘t understand her. Her skin is glowing brightly now, I scoop her up and cradle her in my lap letting the glow surround us both.
I‘m so fucking stupid. I should have known, her mental state was way worse than anyone could have ever imagined. She had years to practice and perfect her camouflage. Delilah could have never known the pain lurking under the surface because Kas knows exactly what to do
because Kas knows exactly what to do and say to hide her emotions from the world
Kas has skillfully remained invisible and hidden behind a facade her whole life. It was a type of emotional pain that was hers and hers alone. Not for prying eyes. No one at Silver Moon knew there was a problem until she almost died. She kept it all inside. She put up a wall, always expecting the worst and not letting anyone see past the wall when the worst happened.
Even after she had a vision. No, especially after she had her vision, which was traumatic for her, I played the part and left her by herself. I should have been there. I should have comforted her. I‘m her
mate. That‘s my number one job for Goddess sakes. I failed Kas again. I don‘t deserve her, but I can‘t live without her. 2
“Baby, please don‘t leave me. Don‘t abandon our pack. Please. You haven‘t done anything wrong. It‘s all been on me In so many ways that I can’t even explain right now, this whole thing has been on m e. I threw myself into work and I was so focused on revenge from the fire, that I
used on revenge from the fire, that I lost track of what‘s important. And that‘s you,” I look at her pleadingly but she won‘t look me in the eye.
I sit her on the edge of the bed and get on my knees in front of her. I grip her hands tightly and look at her until she‘s able to bring herself to look back at me. The fat tears are still rolling down her face but I‘m pretty sure this is as good as I‘m going to get from her right now.
“Kas, I don‘t know how it‘s even fair for me to ask your forgiveness right now. I don‘t deserve it. You have every right to want to leave but I don‘t know how I will survive without you. Call me selfish, because it‘s true,” I can feel my own tears falling down my face now, “Please give m e another chance. I won‘t let you regret it, I promise. Please don‘t leave me, Kas. Please. I need you. It‘s like you say, forever in the past and forever in the future, right? You and me, Kas. Please don‘t give up on us. I was made for you. Whatever I have to do to fix this, I will do. I will put my everything into this relationship to save us.”
She doesn‘t have words. She just has pain. I can feel it. Saint can feel it too. For the first time in almost two months, he isn‘t angry. He just howls in pain in the back of my head. 3
“Please, Kas.” I pull her hands toward me and she easily slides off the bed, back into my lap. She doesn‘t have words. Just pain. She sobs until she falls asleep against me. As our glow fades, I lean against the bed and fall asleep holding her tightly against
me.