Finding Forgiveness

But she only continued to scream, this time muffled by my hand but still just as passionate and she wasn’t showing any signs of calming down.

“Please,” I begged. “You’ve just had a bad dream and now you need to be quiet.”

She shook her head, “No. All I need to go back to Andrea. I need him to find me.”

She then screamed again.

“Rico,” I said summoning one of the men that had just woken up and was stood nearby. “Get a tranquiliser. Now.”

“Yes, Alpha,” he nodded and disappeared.

Ella had heard my command and only panicked more. All that meant was I had to hold her down more forcefully which distressed her even more and the cycle got more and more vicious.

“Leo, no,” she begged. “Don’t do that.”

“I’m sorry,” I said grabbing her wrists, stopping her from pushing me away. “I’m so sorry, Ells.”

“Then don’t do it!”

“Rico, hurry up!” I shouted as Ella began to scream at the top of her lungs.

A few seconds later, Rico returned holding a syringe which he quickly passed to me.

“Help me keep her still,” I ordered and he crouched beside her, catching her flailing arms.

At the touch of a stranger and the sight of the syringe, she shrieked only more and it wrenched my heart that it had to come to this but as soon as I had tapped the air bubbles out, I didn’t hesitate to inject her with the needle.

I felt her relax in my arms and become limp and floppy almost instantly as all noise ceased.

I let out a sigh and clenched my jaw as I just held her in my arms. She was quiet and still but far from at peace.

“Thank you,” I said to the soldier. “Go now.”

He nodded and left me alone with her. Her hands were freezing so I took off my jacket and wrapped it around her before holding her tight and kissing her forehead. Just one more thing she wasn’t going to forgive me for.

END OF PART 2

After that, Ella slipped into a coma. The doctors said considering the dangerous weakness of her body, it was probably best, however, I couldn’t help but feel responsible for inducing it.

I managed to get her back onto my territory and into the hospital where the Doctor’s immediately whisked her away.

“Alpha,” a doctor said to me after approaching me in the waiting room of the hospital.

“How is she?” I asked eagerly.

“She’s severely malnourishment and weak. Her vitals are all over the place and she’s struggling,” she explained. “And there’s something else I need to discuss but you should come into the office,” she added looking around the waiting room that I shared with a few other pack members.

I took a deep breath and ran my hand through my head before nodding and following her into the office.

“She’s pregnant. I presume you know that?” she said.

I nodded, “Of course. I could sense that she was carrying that motherfucker’s spawn almost immediately,” I said.

“She’s only two weeks along and after ever everything she’s been through, the child is unlikely to be healthy and is only adding to the stress on her body,” the Doctor said.

I knew exactly what she was insinuating.

“All the more reason to get rid of it,” I said. “I wanted it gone anyway.”

“Whatever you wish, Alpha, but? would the Luna not want a part in that decision?”

“She is not giving birth to another man’s child, especially not fucking Andrea Martinez’s and I am certainly not raising it alongside my own,” I growled.? “And you said it yourself. The child is unlikely to be healthy anyway and the last thing she needs is a pregnancy.”

“Yes, Alpha,” she said nodding her head. “It’ll be done immediately.”

I got up to leave but turned just before I reached the door.

“… and put it down as a miscarriage. She doesn’t need to know.”

She swallowed and nodded again, “Yes, Alpha.”

It was weeks until she woke up. After the abortion and with time, she stabilised but I still couldn’t bring myself to leave the hospital for long and I spent hours just sat by her as she slept.

The kids didn’t understand of course which only made it harder. Whilst I didn’t want to keep them away from their Mother, confusing and upsetting them by bringing them to see her in this way didn’t feel right either so I kept them away from the hospital mostly in the care of my Mom or Luca. They asked questions and missed her of course but seemed happy enough.

There was no progress in South America. Martinez had frustratingly slipped off the face of existence along with Luciano and everyone else associated. It was severely frustrating and instead of relaxing in, it put everybody anxiously on edge. We knew we hadn’t seen the last of him and that this was far from over yet and the anticipation of when, where and how he would rear his ugly head was agony.

The pack tried to go on as usual but we couldn’t ignore the shadow over us and with Ella still in the same condition, morale was low.

It was a dark time for Stella The beeping of machines. That’s all I could hear for ages. Then the murmurs of voices in rooms all around me got louder before the pulsing of my own heartbeat and the hoarseness of my breath joined. A clinical smell came through my nostrils. It was so sterile and inhuman and totally insufferable. I opened my eyes. At first it was fuzzy and blurry and I could only make out a bright white light above me. Slowly my vision focussed and the clean white ceiling, walls, floors and sheets came into view.

All I wanted was to get out of there. To get somewhere real.

I sat up. There were tubes and wires attached to me, imprisoning me to the buzzing and beeping machines but I began ripping them out. My ears were instantly pierced by a blaring alarm and I wasn’t even free yet. With little control over my body, my fingers fumbled. I felt like I was physically still asleep but my mind was screaming, trapped inside this useless body.

The panic of being so helpless began to set in and my thoughts moved instantly to the person I knew would always help me.

“Leo!” I started screaming. “Leo!”

He’ll come. He’ll get me out of this godforsaken place.

A few seconds later, a woman dressed plain blue clothes scrubs ran in and began trying to calm me.

“Luna, you’re in the hospital. You’re perfectly safe,” she said taking my hand and trying to stop me from ripping out the tubes. “The pack hospital.”

“The pack? Where’s Leo?!” I asked her frantically as tears began to stream. “I need him.”

She nodded seconds before the door slammed open and my mate walked in. He seemed to sigh in relief upon seeing me before he came over and took my hand away from the arm with the tubes.

“Ells, no. You need to leave those alone.”

“I feel so trapped,” I said. “Why is everything so white!?”

“I will have those walls painted whatever colour you like but for now please just lie down and leave those wires alone. They are there to help you.”This content belongs to Nô/velDra/ma.Org .

I nodded and did as he said.