ALWAYS AND FOREVER

Kathy Pov

It took a while for me to adjust to the life without my baby, no I couldn’t adjust, I still cried at night, I still blamed myself and I don’t think I will ever get over the feeling of loss, Ginna had been right about one thing, she left an unforgettable wound that time was doing nothing to heal, not even seeing Ginna and Louis getting sentenced helped no, it’s being over four months since the incident but it was still fresh in my memory, especially when I think about the fact that I would have been huge with child now almost getting ready for delivery.

“Baby?”

Cross called, Cross, he has been an angel, my only constant aside from our family, we were still in Arizona and I didn’t plan on returning to New York anytime soon, I had trauma, for me New York was a bad place where I only had bad memories, here in Arizona I could at least be comfortable, I had my both families and also Anna’s twins, they were a source of joy to me, a glimpse of what it would have been like if my baby had been able to make it.

“Yes?”Nôvel/Dr(a)ma.Org - Content owner.

“What are you doing here alone?”

He asked coming to sit beside me, holding me close, I rested my head on his shoulder staring at the night sky.

“I just wanted to enjoy the night sky, I didn’t know you were back,”

“I am, I don’t like it when you are alone,”

“Don’t worry Cross, I am fine, I promise,”

“I know, I still don’t like it,”

“How did your day go?”

I asked changing the topic, he was overprotective, I understood him but still sometimes I wish he could just stop worrying too much about me, I am fine now, yes I still felt sad from time to time, that’s because I am human and it’s happened but I don’t dwell in it for long, I think if my family and everyone that loves me and is cheering me on, I draw strength from them and my husband.

“Good, but I missed you,”

“I did too, m day was eventful, the twins were so active and Anna wasn’t home earlier, she took a day off and left me and Mom with the kids, it was fun but tiring,”

“But you lived it? I can tell from your eyes,”

“Of course I did,”

“You will make a great mom my love,”

He said and tears gathered in my eyes again, would that ever happen again? Will I ever be able to get another baby? I don’t know why I feel the maker won’t want to give me another because I didn’t treat the one he gave me the first time better, what if he doesn’t? Would I be okay? Would my husband be?”

“What are you thinking about baby? Don’t be sad please,”

“I am not sad, I just had a tiny thought, would we get the chance to be parents again?”

“Of course, we will, I know we will and this time our baby is going to be born and we will be one happy family,”

“I hope so,”

“I know so my love, we can do it,”

“I love you Cross,”

I said looking into his eyes that were filled with so much love and understanding.

“I love you more baby, we will be just fine,”

“Yes,”

I whispered and we spent a few more hours looking at the sky before retiring to our room for the night…

I stared at the stick, still not believing what I was seeing, this was so hard to believe even though I have done the test for the third time even after confirming at the laboratory, still, I couldn’t believe it, But this looked so real, the test couldn’t be wrong all seven times, the laboratories won’t give out inaccurate results, I was sure of that, so I am allowed to be happy again, I walked into the room, leaving the lists I used in the restroom.

I sat down on the sofa in our room as tears of joy streamed down my eyes, My husband walked in on me at that moment, he looked so worried running over to my side.

“Kathy? Are you okay?”

He asked, I couldn’t get any words out.

“Baby, what is it? You look so pale, please talk to me,”

Cross pleaded holding my hands, I was still in shock, I had just done the test, I didn’t actually expect any of it to be positive, but it did, it turned out positive, I didn’t know how I should put it to him that we are having another baby.

“Kathy, please, you are scaring me,”

“Cross,”

I cried, hugging him, he pulled me even closer, patting my back and telling me it will be fine and that we were going to be fine, I started crying even harder knowing that the universe and the maker have decided to smile at us once again.

“Kathy, don’t cry, we are fine, we are going to be just fine, okay?”

“Yes, Cross, it will be fine, we are going to be fine,”

I said pulling out of the hug and smiling through my tears, I kissed him softly, caressing his face, he let me.

“Wanna tell me what’s going on sweetie?”

“Yes, I will tell you, so this morning, I felt like taking a test, I wasn’t feeling any symptoms like the last time but I knew I was late, so I went to get the test done, I did and I am on,”

I let out, he looked confused as fuck, just staring blankly at me, I smiled, he didn’t understand.

“What’s on?”

“I am pregnant Cross, we are going to be parents,”

“What? How? I mean, is that possible? Sorry, of course, it is possible, we have been active, just I wasn’t expecting for us to get so soon, oh God, I am talking nonsense,”

He said and kept quiet for a moment.

“We are pregnant, and I did the test in three different Laboratory to be sure and all the test reports are the same, I just did a kit test myself and it fucking the same,”

I said, I saw tears in his eyes, my husband, he wasn’t just sharing small years, no he was crying, like fully crying, his crying brought his mom and Anna to our room, they both looked scared and concerned.

“What’s going on? Why is Crossie crying so hard?”

Anna asked moving closer to where we sat, I smiled at her and at mom too, mom seemed to understand and ran to hug me.

“What’s going on here?”

Anna and Max both asked in unison as Max walked in, followed by dad, since everyone was here, I may as well share the good news since my husband was still crying so much.

“Everyone, Cross and I are pregnant,”

I announced, the whole room suddenly lighted up with cheers and happy sounds, hugs were exchanged, everyone happy for us, my mother in law being the happiest, she busted out crying, her son’s had to console her too, I saw my father in law wipe his eyes too, they left us after a while, I called my family and told everyone the good news, they were all so happy for us.

Cross opened his arms when it was just the two of us and I ran into his hug, yes, we got another chance and I knew this time, we weren’t going to make any mistakes, I sent a silent prayer of thanks to the maker for giving us another shot at Parenthood and promised that we won’t do anything to mess it up again.

“Thank you Katherine Salvador for everything,”

“No, thank you Cross, you are the best,”

“You too, I love you,”

“I love you more,”

He responded and hugged me tighter…