A Lifetime With You by Athrhteera

AlenaPublished by Nôv'elD/rama.Org.

I swore I didn't even catch a glimpse of Ana moving as she tried to process the words that came out of my mouth. She stayed frozen in her spot, staring at me as if I had just dropped a bomb-it was unintentional for it come out that way.

After what happened with my previous pregnancy, it was hard news for everyone. I had mixed feelings with myself because I couldn't understand if I was supposed to be happy or sad by my current pregnancy. I was still grieving Marco but I knew I needed to move on.

I had assumed this was a second chance for me to move on after Marco. However, I was doubting myself if I could ever move on from my baby boy. I was scared if I couldn't be the best version of myself when I became a mother, especially if I still had glimpses of Marco in my mind.

It wasn't going to be an easy journey for Matteo and I but we knew we needed this to move forward. Life was too short to stay sad. Besides, we both knew our boy, Marco was in a better place. We just needed to accept the face instead of camouflaging the truth. "That's... that's news," Ana replied.

"I know. That's why I don't want to tell anyone else,"

"Alena," she called out before she went to pull me in for a hug.

I didn't understand my own feelings and I thought a hug wasn't going to be a relief. However, the moment Ana wrapped her arms around my body and pulled me in, I knew I needed that the most. I felt so close with my sister, something I hadn't felt in awhile. As a woman to woman, she understood me better than anyone else.

Matteo could be there for me and support me but I knew he had his own struggles as well. I couldn't always depend on hi for my own comfort because it was going to drain him. I never wanted to drain my own partner mentally for the sake of my well being. "When did you find out?" She asked, looking at me.

"Yesterday," I replied.

"Does Matteo know?"

I nodded, slightly smiling.

Truth be told, I was happy by how accepting Matteo was with the whole situation but I was still having doubts with us. Maybe, he had to accept my pregnancy because it was our baby. Maybe, he wasn't even ready yet but he had to be ready. He wasn't going to say those words to my face, it was bound to ruin me,

Then again, I could just be judging him and pretending I could read his mind.

""How do

you

feel? Are you okay?"

The two main questions. The ones that could determine if I was fine or not.

My heart broke at the thought of Marco, knowing I had lost him forever. My baby boy was never going to come back into my life even if I wanted that more than anything else but what if I was given another chance at happines? What if this was the rainbow baby? I stared

at

my sister, unsure of what to say. I didn't have the answer even if I tried because I couldn't determine my own

1/4

feelings-was I okay? Was I fine? How was I cooping with this? The questions lingered in my mind but I didn't have the answers.

"I don't know. I feel okay but I'm still not sure," the truth came out.

"It's okay, especially after what happened. This is all still new for both of you,"

"What if I fail again, Ana? What if I get another heartbreak?"

Ana shook her head before cupping onto my face, "Don't ever question yourself like that. You are by far the greatest person I know and you deserve so much more than what life can offer you. Losing Marco was the worst but maybe, this new baby can be a start of your joy. Maybe, this is what you and Matteo need."

How could my sister be ten years younger than me but filled with wisdom?

I was supposed to be the one to give her advice, to support and guide her but she was the one persuading me to feel better. I remembered when I was her age and I was going through a lot. I knew she was going through a lot on her own as well but she had a good way of hiding it without letting anyone see through.

"You don't know that," I muttered.

"I don't think anyone does. We're all just human beings going through life without knowing what's going to happen next. That is what makes us human," she replied.

"I can't tell Mama. It'll break her."

"How can you be so sure?"

"We both struggled after I lost Marco. I don't know how she will be able to accept this,"

"Ana, we know Mama. She has always been there for us throughout our whole lives and she was the never the one to question her daughters. Please, she'll be there with you through this whole journey and it'll be a lot easier to deal wi mentally,"

"I guess I need all the support I can get after this."

Ana smiled before pulling me in for a hug again. It was nice to feel the warmth of her body against mine especially when we hadn't seen each other in awhile. It was good to reconnect with my sister. I had wished for her to be around more often but I knew she had her own busy life to deal with. "You'll get all the support you need, alright. I'll always be here for you more often,"

I furrowed my brows, a little bit confused. "What do you mean?"

"Actually, I'm transferring here."

My eyes widened in surprise, "Holy shit. Are you serious?"

"One of the reasons why I wanted to pursue my studies away from home was to run away from Papa and his crazy plans but it's not worth it. It's not worth missing out on family just because I keep craving freedom. I want to be there for you and Mama. We don't know how many years we still have together and we should appreciate the time we still have,"

"Oh, my god. Ana... you've got to be kidding me."

"I'm not. I know I'm always kidding around but I'm not."

This time. I was the one who had pulled her in for a hug. We were hugging each other as tightly as we could, jumping up and down in excitement. I had always wanted my little sister around because growing up, I didn't spend much time with her-I was more close with Alexei.

Sun, Nov

C

This was the chance forme to reconnect and strengthen our bond.

"Have you told Mama and Papa?"

"Not yet. You're the first one to know,"

"I'm so excited to have you around!" My lips curved up into a wide smile before I pulled her in for a hug once more, this time it was longer and tighter. I swore we could have problem breathing if we hugged much longer but at this point, we couldn't be bothered. Our cheers were loud in the kitchen, it had caused Matteo to stand by the doorway to check up on us. He was always worried if anything happened especially after I was kidnapped, he knew the enemy could come at any time and he needed to be prepared. "Do we have a celebration, ladies?" He asked, arms crossed.

"Ana is transferring here. She'll be around more often," I replied, excitedly.

"That's great. You'll have someone around when I'm busy,"

"And, with the baby on the way." Ana added, causing Matteo to turn and look at me.

Matteo seemed to be a little bit confused because he didn't expect Ana to know. However, he immediately smiled before he went to place his hand on my waist-he knew by the smile on my face, I needed all the happiness I could get. Besides, Ana deserved to know. "I told her. I hope you're okay with that," I said.

"Why wouldn't I be? It's good news for everyone, Alena."

"I know. We just have to confirm it first,"

Matteo cupped onto my face as he spoke, "Hey, everything is going to be just fine. We'll go through it together like we always do. I know we're both a little nervous."

"Not just a little bit," I interrupted.

He chuckled, "Okay, we're nervous like hell but we're going to be fine."

I closed my eyes as he leaned in to kiss my forehead, comforting me.

If I could turn back time and meet the younger version of me, she was probably going to be surprised at how lucky she was in the future. She managed to convince a Sicilian mafia leader to marry her and somehow along the way, they had fallen in love. Now, they were both head over heels with each other.

Neither of them could imagine a life without one another.

I always thought I was lucky I kissed him but he always said it was the other way around. His life wasn't the best when he met me but his perspectives had changed when we kissed at the beach, when we were pronounced husband and wife.

He had chosen a life of loneliness until he met me.

After I came into his life, all he wanted was to make me happy. All he wanted was a future with me where we could be truly happy, the best version of ourselves.

"I'm so happy for you guys," Ana said with a grin.,

"Thanks, Ana."

10:47 Sun, Nov 10 OW.

"I can start looking for clothes and all that-"

I interrupted her, "Slow down, Ana. This time, we'll take things

slow."

"You're right. Sorry, I got a little bit excited."

Matteo had his hand on my back the entire time.

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